Read These Books. No, Really. Read Them.
This is a list of all the books I’ve read in the past year (that I would recommend… a book would have to be REAL bad for me to WARN you against it) and they span over the topics true crime, memoirs, mental health and money/business. Not the most conventional mix of genres - and you’ll see no fiction books at all on the list. But instead of pretending that I only read Tolstoy and Homer, I wanted to just be honest with you. This is what I read. I know by now that it’s either this - or nothing at all.
Underneath each book, you will find two links to websites where you can buy the books. They’re called ‘affiliate links’. This means that if you buy the book through these links, I get a ‘finder’s fee’. It’s nothing major - and it definitely doesn’t make it more expensive for you. It’ll be a tiny percentage of the sale that goes to me. It’s a cool #influencer thing that I’m quite excited about. Last month I got £16.74 straight into my account because people had used my affiliate links. Not to brag.
Here is the list of my favourite books of the past 12 months:
True Crime
I’ll Be Gone In The Dark - Michelle McNamara
If you’re in any way into true crime, this is very much a ‘duh’ recommendation as it’s a work of art by one of the most talented crime writers ever; Michelle McNamara, who unfortunately passed away before she could finish the book. Fortunately for us, a super-trio consisting of Karen Kilgariff (of My Favorite Murder Podcast fame), Billy Jensen (top notch true crime journalist) and Patton Oswalt (brilliant comedian and Michelle’s husband) finished the book and got it published. It’s about McNamara’s quest to find the Golden State Killer and it’s beautifully written. It’s more an experience than ‘just’ a book. If you’re into true crime, this is essential reading.
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The Devil You Know - Dr. Gwen Adshead
I’ve never clicked ‘add to cart’ faster than when I read what this book was about. A forensic psychiatrist who’s worked at Broadmoor with the ‘criminally insane’ now writes about her experiences and her former patients. Ummmm. YES PLEASE. This could just as well have been listed as a book about mental health, by the way. It probably should have been there. It’s so good. I want to read it again and again and again.
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The Stranger Beside Me - Ann Rule
It’s another true crime ‘duh’ recommendation, but it’s a classic for a REASON. Ann Rule knew Ted Bundy. And just so happened to be helping the police catch Ted Bundy - without knowing that it was Ted Bundy they were looking for. If it was a movie, we’d deem it unrealistic. But it’s real life which makes it so much better. It was 16 or so hours to listen to this but it felt much quicker - I was captivated, painting my shed with headphones in and an open mouth.
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A Serial Killer’s Daughter - Kerri Rawson
I wouldn’t necessarily recommend this as, you know, thoroughly journalistic true crime book. It’s written by Kerri Rawson, the daughter of the BTK serial killer. It paints an interestingly serene childhood with a fairly (!) normal father until the day the FBI comes to her door and she realises what her father really did. It’s a very subjective memoir (aren’t memoirs always subjective?) with dark undertones.
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If You Tell - Gregg Olsen
This is one of the most horrific true crime books I have ever read. It’s so brilliantly and captivatingly written. It’s the awful story of Shelly Knotek’s torture and abuse of her three daughters and how the three sisters only had each other to rely on. Yeah. It’s that bad. You’d have to be a pretty good writer to make this into a good book and fortunately, that’s just what Gregg Olsen is. I couldn’t put it down and I’ll never pick it up again.
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Chase Darkness With Me - Billy Jensen
This book really opened my eyes to the value of internet detectives. Civilians spending their free time solving crimes. If you had asked me before I knew about this book, before I knew about Michelle McNamara, before the Netflix documentary ‘Don’t F*ck With Cats’, I would have rolled my eyes at these people and I would have assumed they did more damage than good. But Chase Darkness With Me really gets to the bottom of how much good these people (can do and do) do. He talks about why he got into true crime and he takes us through the heartbreaking death of McNamara. If you’ve also read I’ll Be Gone In The Dark, this book really brings it all full circle. It feels like a Must Read, when it comes to true crime.
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The Killer Across The Table - Mark Olshaker & John E. Douglas
Did you see the TV show Mindhunter? If not, you should. It’s awesome. And it’s based on these guys. The first FBI agents to start interviewing murderers and serial killers to find out if these crimes can be prevented. This book talks about their process of doing just that. If you’re into true crime AND psychology, this is such an essential book.
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Memoirs
Will - With Smith
If there was EVER a book you needed to LISTEN to, rather than read, this is the one. No one narrates a book like Will Smith. He sings, he raps, there’s background music… He performs the book, rather than just read it. And he gets honest. So, so, so honest. He talks about how he used to throw up when he got an erection after his girlfriend cheated on him. He talks about fantasising about murdering his father. He talks about taxes. F*cking up his career. He talks about the early days of Fresh Prince and DJ Jazzy Jeff and their impact on the US hip hop scene. It’s an absolutely unbelievably good book. I cannot recommend it enough; especially as an audiobook.
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Open Book - Jessica Simpson
I know. Listen. I just really like Jessica Simpson. She’s sweet and kind and she didn’t have it easy, in her career. In her first marriage. This wasn’t an Earth-shattering piece of hardhitting art, it was just Jessica Simpson’s memoir. But it was comforting and interesting and I just really like her. Oh and she sings a little bit in the audiobook too and you’ll know by now, that always gets me.
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Educated - Tara Westover
This was actually the book that made me realise that I read the best when I can listen to the book. I started reading this one and it was so captivating that I couldn’t put it down. I was forced to download the audiobook so I could go about my day and STILL listen to it. I swallowed it in a couple of days and could not stop thinking about it for weeks. It’s been a New York Times Bestseller and has won a bunch of awards and deservedly so. Tara Westover grew up in a cultish family that prepared for the End Of Days. She didn’t attend school, she wasn’t registered anywhere. It’s an incredible book.
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Lily’s Promise - Lily Ebert
This is the memoir of Lily Ebert, a Holocaust and Auschwitz survivor. Growing up in Denmark, we were taught so much about the Holocaust that I naively thought I knew everything about it. But it turns out, there is a difference between knowing the numbers and the overall devastation - and then hearing the story first-hand from a survivor. I was floored and humbled and touched and grateful. And I realised that most of what I’ve learned, ended when the prisoners were liberated. Lily’s Promise tells the story of what happens in the following days - and weeks - and months - afterwards. I’d never even thought about that. Lily Ebert describes realising that whilst she was enduring torture in Auschwitz, the rest of the world was just… moving on. People were living their lives as if it wasn’t happening. That’s a point of view I had never even considered. It also reflects on the antisemitism that still exists today - and which existed long before the Holocaust. Something I am not alone in needing to be more mindful of. It’s a gruesome and life affirming story told by a beautiful human and I think we all need to read it.
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Mental Health
Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents - Lindsay C. Gibson
I have to be honest, it took me a while to read this book because I didn’t think it was for me. My parents didn’t strike me as ‘emotionally immature’. I grew up with a lot of toxic people, but I’d use other words to describe them. When I started reading, I realised that oh… Oh! This book IS about our parents. And grandparents. And partners. And us. I don’t know anyone who won’t be able to recognise at least SOMETHING in themselves or the people around them. I read it after ending a long friendship and it made me understand the other person - and myself - and it definitely helped me heal. I want to read it again. At least once a year.
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The Boy Who Was Raised As A Dog - Bruce D. Perry & Maia Szalavitz
I’ve read this book three times now. Bruce D. Perry talks about the psychology of children - and how a few therapists tried to convince the world that kids aren’t just super resilient; they have needs and they can be traumatised and this will alter how they end up as adults. It’s the story of several of the kids that Perry worked with - their horrible stories and how they he approached their cases and began treating them. It’s very sad but very interesting - if you’re into that sort of stuff.
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Maybe You Should Talk To Someone - Lori Gottlieb
After I finished this book, I desperately looked for similar books because it felt so perfect, I didn’t want it to end. A therapist goes through a break-up and begins seeing a therapist herself - and she tells the story of, well, just that. The process. Of being a therapist whilst seeing one. Whilst recovering from a breakup. It’s funny, comforting, interesting and healing, I found. I just wish I could forget it so I can read it again.
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What Happened To You? - Oprah Winfrey & Bruce D. Perry
This is a really good book if you’re new to learning about trauma and therapy and healing. Our favourite Bruce D. Perry (from the childhood psychology book above!) talks to Oprah - yes, that Oprah - about the very basics of how trauma affects your mind and body. Oprah makes it all very understandable.
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Good Morning, Monster - Catherine Gildiner
This book was mentioned by Georgia Hardstark on the podcast My Favorite Murder and I instantly bought it. A therapist describes five very different and interesting patients she has had. Their life stories, how their therapy progressed and how their healing process looked. She’s super introspective and considerate. She’s honest about her own errors as a therapist. If I had ONE complaint, it would be that it’s a bit… too… American? You know what I mean? It’s framed as ‘the story of five HEROES’… And each story ends with her saying ‘and that’s why I think this patient was a HERO’… and it feels a bit icky, I think. Maybe it’s just me. It definitely hasn’t stopped me from reading this book twice in a year.
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How To Be Alone - Lane Moore
This book made me feel normal. Lane Moore’s relationship with the world and her family is just… unconventional. And that’s okay. As someone with a different upbringing, a different background, a different brain… This was such a good read. And Lane Moore is so funny and easy to love too. The book is like a dear friend saying, ‘Hey, sometimes things just suck, okay? But it’ll be fine.’ and now I feel like I’m best friends with Lane Moore. And oh, did I need that friendship in my life.
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Money
Real Life Money - Clare Seal @myfrugalyear
Last year, I decided to try and look my weird relationship with money in the eyes. When I asked people where to start, everyone pointed me in the direction of Clare Seal. Particularly her Instagram account @myfrugalyear. So I was super pleased when I realised she had a book out. I read quite a few money books last year and this is the only one I would recommend. It’s realistic, down to earth, introspective and very… human. It’s the only money book that didn’t just make me feel worse about everything. The other books seemed like they’d been written by and for robots with superior financial skills and willpower… Clare’s book is written by a human, for other humans.
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Alchemy - Rory Sutherland
I interviewed Rory Sutherland for a radio show once. He showed up wearing a pink suit and proceeded to talk at me for over an hour. He was so eccentric and odd that I immediately Googled him when I came home and bought his book. He reads the audiobook and he has a very soothing voice. Its’s a book about advertising, basically. How companies sell stuff. How the economy isn’t always as logical as people want it to be. It’s about brands doing clever things to sell their stuff. There is a real chance that this book isn’t for you. I don’t think I knew that it’d be for me either. But it just was. Because it was so interesting and full of fun stories and facts. It made me look at adverts in a very different way. It twisted the way my brain was used to thinking about things like value, especially when it comes to time.
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That’s it for me. I hope you’ll like whichever of these books you decide to read - if any. I know it’s a very odd mix of books. But I enjoyed them all, in very different ways.